please leave a voicemail when you call me
it’s much better to think that you
couldn’t wait to get the words out
and hear my hello
before you had to spill your contents
to a beep
and an empty silence
while you thought of
what i could possibly say to you.
and the news
good or bad
or maybe like
the mail truck didn’t come today,
but there’s always tomorrow
and then you end your sentence with a
call me back
and i do
and it’s beautiful just to know
that you cared enough to leave words to space
and trusted me to hear them
maybe something new is happening
somethings changed and maybe i’ve been forgotten
i think maybe they never cared to remember
and these old cement blocks melt while minutes pass and my two
previously plucked gray hairs spring from my scalp to remind me that
no one knows each other anymore
and i think maybe its pivotal and pointed and painful and poignant and
Potentially Prosperous
that they don’t need to
i met myself i kissed myself i held myself i talked to myself i felt small by myself
i was mirrored
it was a sign maybe
and i know now how it feels maybe but i don't know i need to think more later
watching my skin pale with each passing day growing towards my bed as the nights lengthen i'm not supposed to survive this way my scars become visible again and the last minutes of summer fade from my skin the isolation the flip of my appearance i find myself doing the exact same things standing at the mirror examining the shape i take in each pair of underwear touching my chest staring into my own eyes the season of inspection and introspection is upon us and i will overanalyze every step and every glance and every door held open until i break.
with darker nights come darker bags.
What do you have left?
A weight of thought and ill admitted hope
The only thing propelling you
is the squeak of a shoe and
the static in yours.
Crossed limbs pushing joints wayward
Wrapped into yourself
Guarded
An Armadillo.
Skin mucus tears saliva.
A trailing conversation and upward glares
Grey linoleum and artificial lighting
God this can’t be it.
Please don’t be it.
In silence it quickens
Your pace
A smile spreads across your eyes
Sharing with no one
You alone.
Loops in time.
Apple acidity burning a hole in my stomach.
Melting through falling slowly
Nod off
A slow touch
Bile rises to
A head wavers in tune
Wishuwerehere
Red heart balloon lost helium in due time.